she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
