just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
