is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
The adults are the big ones right?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
