Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
