i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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