Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
