I'm really into asian looking animals
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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