Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
i think my cat just said my name.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
