glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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