i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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