Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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