I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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