I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize