Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
