She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
