whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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