Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
