so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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