barbara walters just said penis...
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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