hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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