i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
