So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Randomize
