my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
