i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
