Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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