Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize