I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
