then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
