Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
