so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
