More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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