Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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