does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
