She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
