my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
