Betty ford says i'm here all night
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
