pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
