Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
