one might say we're banned from that church
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
