i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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