love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
