Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
We smell like vodka and hangover
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