A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize