My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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