This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
