This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize