wrigley field is MILF paradise
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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