I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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