How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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