I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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