OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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